I couldn't withhold the tears in my eyes while looking at Eve's body this morning as I changed her clothes. The mild eczema that she has looks like turning into a disaster. The dry, red blotches that once spread on some parts of her body have become inflamed, swelling, and scaly. Her neck does not run out of moisture. Red bumps that look like pimples are appearing on her arms, body, face, neck, and legs.
It breaks my heart so much to see my little girl going through a lot. Her cold is keeping her from breathing and sleeping normally. The itchiness of her skin makes it worse. If only God can give me her physical discomfort. At one point I thought, I was being punished. But I realized that my God is a loving God. What I can do is cry out to Him and keep the faith that He will take good care of our little one. After all, she is His daughter. Behind this trial is one good purpose.
I so missed her smiles everytime we talk. I tried to let her smile today, but the discomfort overwhelmed her happy side. I am getting used to seeing that sweet smile everyday. Not being able to get a glimpse of it in a day is totally heartbreaking, specially when you know that she is suffering a lot.
I've been through a lot of challenges before. My new calling as a mother is an addition to the totality of the character that I have to play. I wonder if I have enough strength to fight the battle of motherhood. I think I do, or else, my God will never let me become one.
This will come to pass. One day, I will see my little girl's precious smiles again. I cannot wait.